Tuesday, December 18, 2012

When I think of healing it is emotional and spiritual.

I believe everyone regardless of faith or lack of religious affiliation has a spiritual side. I think of spirituality as the connection between the emotional and cognitive. I believe when emotional trauma is indelibly placed on the survival centers of the brain through biochemical imprint the emotional and spiritual have to go to work to resolve the conflict which cannot and should not be repressed.

If trauma is emotional rather than physical there has to be emotional answers to resolve the feeling to benevolence of the person.

For me the best way for children to heal is to provide safe emotional content to express their feelings and find expression for their 'concerns.' Concerns can be worry, they can be fear, but, basically children can perceive their world differently and have irrational fears in the best of parenting circumstances.

I was once a parent of my young sons. I never underestimated their misunderstanding of life. But, to me for a child to feel safe to express themselves they need to have privacy (even in a room full of others, a child can find privacy of thought and expression) and permission. Drawing, making a work of art through modeling clay or painting provides the emotional connection between emotion and concrete expression. Only when adults understand the concerns of a child can adult(s) begin to communicate effectively and with indulgence. 

A child can cope. They can endear the memory of a loved one forever in memory of benevolence to self. 

Memories are forever and it is okay if emotions come to the surface when those memories are touched in the real world. But, incorporating LOSS in a real way to prolong the love they shared will make them stronger and give them more endurance. Teddy bears sit on a shelf and become thread bare. But, they last forever and all the memories projected into them are always there. Memories are wonderful things and they can be fond memories that never leave even though a loved one has.

The American Red Cross passed out stuffed puppies to all the children at the memorial service. It is also a common denominator between them now. That and the comfort dogs are powerful stuff.