May 7, 2018
By Andy Borowitz
Washington—In a move that has stirred controversy (click here) in both legal and medical circles, Donald J. Trump removed Rudy Giuliani from his legal team on Monday by naming him the new White House doctor.
The decision to appoint the former New York mayor to such a key medical position raised eyebrows, in no small part because Giuliani would become the first White House doctor in history not to possess a medical degree.
But, in an official White House briefing to announce the decision, the press secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, pushed back against the criticism of Giuliani’s nonexistent medical credentials. “Rudolph Giuliani is every bit as qualified to be a doctor as he is to be a lawyer,” she said.
Dr. Giuliani hit the ground running in his new job, immediately scheduling an hour-long appearance on Sean Hannity’s Fox News program to discuss the state of Trump’s health.
“Is the President’s mental health good?” Giuliani asked on the air. “Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. Is he all there? You really have to define what you mean by ‘all.’ If he’s out of his mind, so what? That’s nobody’s business. The important thing is, I’m on TV again talking a lot, and I’ve never felt so alive....
A Physician at White House (click here) earns an average of $275,114, ranging from $153,315 at the 25th percentile to $344,427 at the 75th percentile, with top earners (the top 10%) earning more than $495,773. Compensation is derived from fewer than 20 profiles, including base salary, equity and bonus.
These men are such a joke. Ever since New York City was hit by terrorists on 911, Guiliani has been selling himself as a security expert. He isn't. He saw many people killed that day and the firemen's radios didn't even work. Guiliani is a failure, plain and simple. He plays with the system as if he owns it and he should be ostracized as the worst mayor in the world.
December 12, 2018
B Kenneth P. Vogel
Washington — The special counsel’s investigation (click here) was grinding relentlessly onward, with President Trump’s former national security adviser pleading for leniency in his case and his former fixer about to be sentenced for his crimes. But Mr. Trump’s personal lawyer, Rudolph W. Giuliani, was in Manama, Bahrain, on Tuesday, meeting with the king and the interior minister of an important United States ally in the Middle East.
The government-run Bahrain News Agency featured a photo of Mr. Giuliani meeting in a royal palace with King Hamad bin Isa al-Khalifa. The story said the king discussed “Bahraini-U. S. relations” with Mr. Giuliani, who was described as leading a “high-level U.S. delegation.”
But Mr. Giuliani was not in Bahrain, a country with a record of human rights abuses, on official business. He was there to seek a lucrative security consulting contract with the government.
The trip was part of a concerted push Mr. Giuliani has undertaken in the last few weeks to win business from governments around the world — including in Africa and South America — for a firm he owns called Giuliani Security and Safety....
